It’s almost like the better I do, the more my feeling of inadequacy actually increases, because I’m just going, ‘Any moment, someone’s going to find out I’m a total fraud, and that I don’t deserve any of what I’ve achieved.’ I can’t possibly live up to what everyone thinks I am and what everyone’s expectations of me are.

Happiness is something I always fear,
To me ,It is far away and never near,
Patient waiting for over severals years.
Happiness comes, but quickly disappears.

Few days of joy , followed by years of sorrows,
Will I ever get to see a happy tomorrow?
I am happy to be sad ,it forms my routine,
Cant just keep wiping my tears umpteen.

A moment of joy forces me to worry,
Any huge sorrow ,to make me teary?
My tears have dried now and let them be,
I am happy to be sad , as sad can be.

Smiles and laughter, not meant for me,
Darkness and sorrows are my cup of tea,
I fear happiness , it kills me.
Life is mourning,and thats it for me.

I am not good at studies and not even in other activities. Whenever I see qualities in myself, I just see the negative points. Why am I here on this earth??

..this 2 years really a trying period for me?

It’s almost like the better I do, the more my feeling of inadequacy actually increases, because I’m just going, ‘Any moment, someone’s going to find out I’m a total fraud, and that I don’t deserve any of what I’ve achieved.’ I can’t possibly live up to what everyone thinks I am and what everyone’s expectations of me are.

assalamualaikum, please take a look for what is happening on palestine right now. they need our voices, spread the awareness. try to translate if you can so people from other country will know what is the actual situation there.