Time is a funny thing.

You think you have unlimited amounts of it with the people that you love, then one day in the blink of an eye, all of that changes.

You look back on all the time you wasted - the time you spent doing silly and fruitless things, the time you spent away, and the time you gave to foolish pursuits. You wind regretting all of that, in the end because it was all time you could have been spending with the people that you care about.

Social media is on my list of regrets now. It was time that could have been better spent. So I won't be wasting any more of yours with frivolity and senseless scrolling.

Do yourself a favor and do as I am doing - turn off the screen, put down the phone, and find better uses of your time before you can't.

Go outside. Make friends. Spend time with your family. Find love and never, ever let go.

I love you all.

Christ is King.

- Sweepy

A priest and a rabbi were walking down the street, and passed by a 6 year old boy.

The priest looked at the rabbi and said, "Let's screw him."

The rabbi replied "Outta what?"

I was in the bar the other night, and a guy had a heart attack. Someone screamed, "does anyone know CPR‽"

I replied, "Yeah, and I know the rest of the alphabet as well."

Everyone laughed, except one guy.

My distaste for jews began when I was a kid, and a jewish pedophile asked me if I wanted to buy some candy.

Also if nobody else is gonna say it, Hamas tunnel construction > jew tunnel construction

The only thing I find surprising about the jew tunnels in NY is that they dug them themselves.

Last time they did any physical labor, it laterally killed 6 gorillion of them.

My wife and I had a huge fight, and she threw me out of bed. Took me a while to find somewhere to sleep, but sofa, so good.