“I used to hope to see you in my dreams, too. But whenever I did, it just made waking up even worse.”

“I always used to think you were my favorite constellation. You were always there, so easy to look at. To contemplate, to write about or dream about... But I could never reach you.”

I'm not afraid of being lost. We all wander off from time to time. It's the fear of never quite finding myself that keeps me up at night

everything is up for interpretation. except for what i say. that must be understood exactly as i meant it

‎I used to wonder why "الكاظمين الغيظ" were promised a great reward; I mean a reward for basically doing nothing seemed a bit too generous. Then I found out first-hand how hard to be one of them actually is. To be silent, not just word silent but action silent, when angry. To speak no ill, to do no harm, to think no evil... How hard, how sometimes impossible

one day you think: I want to die. and then you think, very quietly: actually. actually. I think I want a coffee. a nap. a sandwich. a book. and / want to die turns day by day into want to go home, I want to walk in the woods, I want to see my friend, I want to sit in the sun, I want a cleaner kitchen, I want a better job, I want to live somewhere else. I want to live.

I dream of lost vocabularies
that might express some of what we no longer can.

I do mind, resent really, years wasted with my own neurotic living and my dull mind.

I am constantly trying to communicate something incommunicable, to explain something inexplicable, to tell about something I only feel in my bones and which can only be experienced in those bones.